Is he gay? Or just a touchy, cute straight friend? I’m losing my mind.

Sharing this cute story after taking permission from the OP. You guys are welcome to give him opinion. 

You can find the original post here

My Fav Subreddit AskGayBros

I feel should start by saying I’m a closeted gay in high school. I’ve known this guy, who I’ll call Dylan, for about two years now, and for the past year I’ve been thinking about him almost every day. However, I just have no idea how he feels about me. We hug and touch a lot, and I feel we look each other in the eyes longer than most guys would. But then he’ll do things that just make me wonder if he’s actually gay, or just really… touchy? I don’t really know how to explain it. Let me just go into more detail.

When we first met, we were on the wrestling team. I was a sophomore and he was a freshman. I didn’t talk to him much and I didn’t think about him “like that” (Thinking back, I keep wondering how I didn’t think he was cute at the time).

Then comes football season. We still don’t really talk to each other much. It wasn’t until the first game night that I started to have thoughts about him. Before walking down to the field before the game, everyone was told to pair up so that the team would walk toward the field in two lines side by side. After I failed to get a partner of my own (I’m a pretty quiet kid), Dylan comes up to me and offers to walk with me, which I (gladly) agreed to. While walking down towards the field, we’re told to hold hands with the person next to us (I still don’t get why we did this. I guess to show unity and teamwork?). So, Dylan, without hesitation, grabs my hand and our fingers interlock. I look up in to his eyes, and he’s staring back at me. We just stared at each other for about 5 seconds, until some guy behind us told us to stop interlocking fingers because it was gay. That broke off the stare and we “corrected” our hands. After this, Dylan started to pop up in my mind more often than other guys. . Every game for the rest of the season, Dylan and I made a deal to always partner up when walking towards or leaving the game field. Whenever someone couldn’t find a partner to walk with and tried asking me to walk, Dylan would always tell them to “back off my man”. When someone tried taking him as a partner, I stepped in and took Dylan back. This prompted him to say “huh, I guess you actually do care about me”. I probably should’ve said something, but I just laughed about it.

So this continues for the rest of the season, and eventually Dylan and me start talking more and hanging out outside of school with other friends. Wrestling season comes around again, but he didn’t join the team that year. But in December, Dylan, me, and 4 other people decide to go paint balling. During the trip, I would catch him staring at me every now and then. After playing, we decided to get pizza. We sat at booths. Dylan sits down and I go to sit down next to him. I joked about how I got to sit next to my favorite person here, while going to lean on him, but Dylan laughed and said “I’m not gay man” while also moving away (kind of broke my heart). So there it is, he just told me he’s not gay right? But there’s more.

More stuff happens and it’s like the end of January. Dylan and I still talk and see each other as we walk through the hall way and at the end of the day, but less because we only have football together (after all this time, I still don’t even have his number). Dylan and one of our friends decided to sneak up on me and pretty much hug the crap out of me. It happened on random day, until it eventually started to happen every time we saw each other. For the first week since it started Dylan would only do it when the other friend did it with him, but even when that friend stopped, Dylan continued to do it. It also turned from “surprise hugs” to just hugs as we passed by each other in the hallway or at the end of the day. We even started running up to each other just to hug for a couple of seconds.

And the whole “staring into each other eyes for longer than normal” thing also started again. There are a couple moments in particular that stand out to me. After a hug in the hallway and a short talk, we both started to walk away, but I looked back over my shoulder and saw him looking right back at me, and he shouted “see you after school!” And we held the gaze for a while until I turned the corner to keep walking. Another time, the very last day of school, we were sitting next to each other in gym and we were talking about scheduling or something for next year. The conversation went quiet for a bit, but I turned my head to look at him, and he looked right back at me. This felt different to all the other times he looked at me. A wave of happiness surged throughout my body as we just sat and smiled at each other for what felt like an eternity. The bell eventually rang and we went our separate ways.

Summer starts again and all the football players are weightlifting in the school. Our coaches make us do these neck exercises that require a partner. Dylan and I instantly partner up for these, and instead of doing the exercise, we mostly just fool around (tickling each other, shoving, more stares, etc.). He kept making jokes about wanting to wrestle me again. At one point we start doing running drills outside in the heat, so some people started going shirtless. Some friends, and Dylan, kept trying to get me to go shirtless with them (Dylan never went shirtless). I eventually did, and Dylan stared for a good while at my body, before rolling up his sleeves and asking if I thought he was hot, which I flat out told him “Yea you are”.

So I just realized how much I wrote, so I’m just going to bullet point other reasons as to why I think he’s gay.

  • I’ve never heard him mention anything about liking girls at all. Only once (like a week ago), as a cheerleader was walking by he said “I think I could mac it to her”.
  • We still hug, touch (grabbing my arms, arm around shoulder, etc.), and stare everyday.
  • We joke about loving each other and he makes jokes about me taking him to prom. (One friend said we looked like butt buddies).
  • Last year, during cold football games (like 75% of the games), we would huddle together just to keep warm (Pretty much us hugging each other while shivering in the cold).
  • He’s been starting to get more “cuddly”. Ex: For one football game this year we sat next to each other on the bus. He leaned his head on my shoulder and I put my head on his. We stayed like this for a while before he got up. Then he did it again a couple minutes later, this time I hugged him and rubbed his stomach, and he let me. Ex (2): Couple days later we we’re sitting in an auditorium next to each other. He put his arm around my shoulder and I rested my head on his shoulder. That stopped until he put his head on my shoulder, my head on his. (Like straight friends don’t do this right?)
  • Still jokes about wanting to wrestle me.
  • This year the football team doesn’t hold hands while walking towards the game anymore. Like a week ago, before walking down to the game, he brought up how he remembers, and misses, holding my hand while walking. He even grabbed my hand again with fingers interlocked, but we didn’t walk the whole way like that.

I really do like him, and thinking about him makes me excited just to go to school and football practice. When he’s not there, I get this bad weird feeling in my body and my whole mood feels off. Honestly, if he wasn’t on the football team I would have probably quit already, and I’m already thinking about leaving the wrestling team because he said he doesn’t want to wrestle this year either (which is why him joking about wrestling me gets me thinking about stuff…).

So here I am now, writing about all the reasons why I think he’s gay. I want to believe he’s gay, but I just keep thinking about me being wrong. I want to ask him but I just don’t know how to go about it because we are never really alone together. I don’t even know his phone number or how I would get that. What do you guys think? Is he gay or not? and if he is, how do I go about going further with him?

Sorry for the long post, I’ve never really written one of these before. I haven’t even really started going on Reddit until a couple days ago, but the community seems awesome.

Advertisements

Best Kdrama “BLACK”

Not your typical “Saranghaeyo, oppa” Drama.

This one has everything humor, crime, gore, love, heart break, supernatural, cops, disaster, beautiful OST, bitter sweet ending and ARA GO ❤ .

Available on Netflix.

Favorite Quotes:

“We call those who have lost their spouses by death “widow” or “widower”. And kids who have lost their parents are called orphans.
But do you know what parents who have lost their children are called?
There’s no word. It’s so cruel that there’s no word for it.“

“ You must not make eye contact with any human who’s in love. If you do, a horrible tragedy will happen to you. “

 fbc2ab7ff9301459d7375620bd808c6b

My Favorite read right now- “Jazz For Two”

I love the subtle progression of Taeyi ‘s interest in Seheon .

It went from:

“Don’t fucking play that piano and I don’t want to see you” to

“Fine, you can play but don’t let me hear it” to

“Play something for me” to

“You can only play for me” to

“I don’t care what anyone else says but you are the only one who can make me happy”.

I can’t wait to see more of these two. 

Read here.

Favorite Shoujo Manga

I am not that into Shoujo anymore but there are few I religiously follow.

  1. Namaikizakari: I think this will be my forever best Shoujo manga. Read here.
  2. Akatsuki no Yona manga: Read here.
  3. Lan Chi: Read here
  4. Omoi, Omoware, Furi, Furare manga (I don’t know why I am reading this): Read here
  5. True Love: Read Here
  6. Kurosaki-kun No Iinari Ni Nante Naranai manga: Read Here
  7. Kyou No Kira-kun: Read here
  8. Hana-kun to Koisuru Watashi (Hiatus): Read here

 

And here are the list my friend suggested that I am yet to read.

Buddy go
Hachitmitsu ni hatsukoi
Honey come honey
Kiken mania
Suki desu suzuki kun
Sabaku no harem
Uso kano
Uwasa no midori kun
Strange dragon
Rakuen route
Reimen no arcana
Stardust wink
Ore no yome ni nare yo
Rere hello
Lab love
Momoyama kyoudai
Bokura wa itsumo
Hana kun to koisuru watashi
Hatsu haru
Haru matsu bokura
Hatsu haru
Himegemi to sanbiki no- kemono
Chicchai toki kara suki dakedo
Koisuru harinezumi

BL Novel Suggestions

These are my Favorite BL novel. I am not writing any summary but these are all with happy endings (angst in between).

 

  1. Quickly wear the face of the devil: Keztranslations
  2. Love Sick: Read here
  3. Are You Addicted? or 你丫上瘾了?: Tatatamtu (Book 2 I can email it to you if you are interested.)
  4. Like love or Will you still love me even if I’m a man?: Read here
  5. Strongly Pampered Male Wife: Read Here
  6. Do You Remember My Name?: Shem’s Translation
  7. Agreement of Being Gay for 30 Days: Ikigainovels
  8. The Daily Life of Being the Campus Idol’s Fake Boyfriend: Yuikotranslation
  9. Brother: BLtranslation.
  10. Waiting For You Online: Ayyshadowtrans
  11. Love You 59 Seconds: Read here
  12. Beloved Marriage in High Society: Ikigainovels Ch 1 & 2, Ch 3 to 5 & Crescentmoon
  13. Falling In Love With The Enemy Or Counter Attack: Joell55
  14. 2 Moons: Read here
  15. He is His Excellency Zhi Li: Crescentmoon
  16. 15P 7H 6SM: Polarbearadise
  17. He is His Excellency Zhi Li: Crescentmoon
  18. Beloved Marriage in High Society: Crescent Moon
  19. Love You 59 Seconds: Read here